Once upon a time there was a tiny baby named OW
Not that kind of a story. A real story that happened when I was a tiny baby.
Gee whiz. All right already. Ow.
The one about the couch.
OK. You were a tiny baby and me and daddy were sitting on the floor on the futon under the window and we couldn't see you, but we thought since we could see you if you tried to crawl away and you couldn't walk yet or even crawl all that well you would be OK playing on the floor.
Then daddy said She's being awful quiet and we looked and you had pulled all the cushions off the sofa, piled them up on the floor, climbed up onto the couch, climbed onto the arm of the couch, climbed up onto the table next to the couch, poured out Pyewacket's food onto the table, poured her water onto her food, climbed back onto the couch, went to the other side, got the diaper bag, dragged it back down the cushions onto the floor, opened it, pulled out the can of formula powder and by the time we looked, you were dipping your hand into the can and eating fistfuls of powder.
From my guzzle to my zorch?
Your zorch is down there. And yeah, you were covered. We put you in the bathtub and it was filled with formula.
Why didn't you save the bathtub water to give me in my bottle?
What are you, kidding? We used to filter your formula water twice and then boil it for five minutes and wash your bottles with anti-bacterial soap. We weren't going to give you bathroom water formula once your poopy butt was in it. Besides, the tub probably wasn't very clean.
Tell me another story.
Once upon a time there was a tiny baby named (whack) Ow.
Tell me about when you took me to the Aquarium.
Well, the first time you talked to us from inside my tummy
What I would like to say to you is KICK
Absolutely. So the first time you let us know what was going on was there so we took you when you were brand new, not even a month old, and you were so interested in the colors and the fish you forgot that you didn't know how to stand up.
Ooooh. Tell me a story...
Not that kind of a story. A real story that happened when I was a tiny baby.
Gee whiz. All right already. Ow.
The one about the couch.
OK. You were a tiny baby and me and daddy were sitting on the floor on the futon under the window and we couldn't see you, but we thought since we could see you if you tried to crawl away and you couldn't walk yet or even crawl all that well you would be OK playing on the floor.
Then daddy said She's being awful quiet and we looked and you had pulled all the cushions off the sofa, piled them up on the floor, climbed up onto the couch, climbed onto the arm of the couch, climbed up onto the table next to the couch, poured out Pyewacket's food onto the table, poured her water onto her food, climbed back onto the couch, went to the other side, got the diaper bag, dragged it back down the cushions onto the floor, opened it, pulled out the can of formula powder and by the time we looked, you were dipping your hand into the can and eating fistfuls of powder.
From my guzzle to my zorch?
Your zorch is down there. And yeah, you were covered. We put you in the bathtub and it was filled with formula.
Why didn't you save the bathtub water to give me in my bottle?
What are you, kidding? We used to filter your formula water twice and then boil it for five minutes and wash your bottles with anti-bacterial soap. We weren't going to give you bathroom water formula once your poopy butt was in it. Besides, the tub probably wasn't very clean.
Tell me another story.
Once upon a time there was a tiny baby named (whack) Ow.
Tell me about when you took me to the Aquarium.
Well, the first time you talked to us from inside my tummy
What I would like to say to you is KICK
Absolutely. So the first time you let us know what was going on was there so we took you when you were brand new, not even a month old, and you were so interested in the colors and the fish you forgot that you didn't know how to stand up.
Ooooh. Tell me a story...